August 19, 2013

driving on Ciovo (forget it !)

Option ONE: get yourself a Dinky Toy.

Option TWO: wash your car in boiling hot water.

Any other option to drive a car on Ciovo, the island next to Trogir,
If you still want to give it a try, don't tell your insurance you tried, and take a hammer to first get rid of them mirrors, as you're gonna loose them anyway in those impossible narrow dead end roads.

Yesterday evening I tried (oh God, did I try), to make an unexpected visit to some internet friends who have a charming cottage there.

Mission impossible, as those roads are not built for modern cars.
Nor even for old cars, however than the trip is less stressful, as one more scratch does not matter.

No, these roads are built for donkeys, and if you think a horse would work as well than, well....forget it, as even the donkey should be a small one.

The horror already starts in Trogir, because to get to an island you have to cross a bridge.
No big deal you may say, well, than you have never visited Trogir and it's bridge.

If (and I do mean ...IF...) you are a dare devil, looking for a rush of adrenaline, go for that bridge !!!!
Not to do some bungee jumping (the water is only two meters below the bridge), but to experience how scooters and motorbikes crisscross between the traffic jam you're in.

And if (and I do mean ...IF...) you manage to get to the other side, still by car, and dare to turn right, you better visit your cardiologist before you continue.
As than the real "fun" starts, hiiiiiii haaaaaaa.

Already in the first section you'll go nuts, crying for your mother, as them turns are truly worse than in the most crazy Luna park ride.
Not the G-forces, no way, but you'll experience "some" opposite cars, loaded with pale faces, covered in tears, and they are the lucky ones, as they are almost out of the madhouse.

Thought it couldn't get worse, ha haaa haaaaaaa.
Every split second your heart stops when another group of lost pedestrians show up in the dark (it's evening).

Reanimated you continue your trip through hell, your car still with three mirrors I hope.
"Lucky you", as that inside mirror will stay connected to your vehicle, giving you an idea how frightened you look when driving on Ciovo.

Shall I continue this horror story, or simply let you decide yourself to either go for an easy trip in the country or dump your car in a deep Dalmatian ravine (on them many other dumped cars).

Whatever you like to increase your adrenaline level, there are a lot of options in Dalmatia.
Mountain biking, diving, bungee jumping, rafting, riding on one of them silly bananas *), it's all child's play compared to driving a car on them crazy roads on Ciovo.

Still I do not understand people who plan a holiday in Dalmatia, having the time of there life, and go for a ride on a banana :-)
Mind you, a banana !!!!, as that's what you'll have to tell your family when returning home again.
"And, how was your holiday in Dalmatia ?"
"Ahhhh, perfect, and you know, I was riding a banana".
"A whatttttttttt ?"
"Oh well, I must confess I got totally drunk after a trip to Ciovo, and decided to do something normal the other day, after getting sober".
"Right, so now we understand".
"A banana still is far more normal than a car on Ciovo".
"Even when it's a small one ?"
"Yes, even a tiny, mini, dinky one !"


Posted by Picasa